Emotionally mature, responsive people have an emotional engagement instinct that works smoothly. They like to connect, and they naturally give and receive comfort under stressful conditions. They are sympathetic and know how crucial friendly support can be.
They reflect on their actions and try to change. Emotionally mature people are capable of taking a look at themselves and reflecting on their behavior. They may not use psychological terms, but they clearly understand how people affect each other emotionally. They take you seriously if you tell them about a behaviour of theirs that makes you uncomfortable. They’re willing to absorb this kind of feedback because they enjoy the increased emotional intimacy that such clear communication brings. This shows interest in and curiosity about other peoples’ perceptions along with a desire to learn about and improve themselves. Willingness to take action as a result of self-reflection is also important. It isn’t enough to just say the right things or apologize. If you’re clear about what bothers you, they’ll remain aware of the issue and demonstrate follow-through in their attempts to change.
Gibson, Lindsay C. Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents. ch. 11, 25:00 – 26:20
