After nearly a year of constant exam stress, my stamina to continue jumping the hurdles that constitute the PhD program feels almost completely exhausted. And yet, next week will be critical for determining whether or not I will be able to continue with the program.
The one source of motivation that keeps me from entirely collapsing is my sense of what a wonderful community Massey College is. Leaving the program would necessarily involve leaving Massey one year earlier than would otherwise be possible.
At the same time, I recognize that I have had a tremendous amount of difficulty with the easier of my two comprehensive examinations. Even if I get through next week, I will have a significantly more daunting barrier to overcome in a few months.